Expressing Encouragement

“Your mom was proud of you!” The words in yesterday’s email from one of Mom’s friends brought tears to my eyes.

This expression of encouragement gripped my heart in a deep way. I admit, I’m amazed at how the words still bring tears to my adult eyes.

It’s been a long time since Mom died, and even longer since I was a child looking for parental affirmation. So why do these words, even today, still touch my soul? Perhaps it’s the deep bond between parent and child. Whether adopted or biological, the relationship between generations impacts us more deeply than I think we often realize.

As we mature, our extended relationships seem to take over our time and energies. We look to others in our professional circles, or church friends, or fellow parents of our school age child to share kudos and encouragements. Sometimes we feel that we “outgrow” the need for our parents. Perhaps we are wrong.

Which brings me to the next thought: What words that we speak to our children today will they carry in their hearts forever? Will they feel encouraged in whatever their capabilities? Will they feel unconditional love through your words? Do they know you are proud of them?

As wordsmiths, we understand the power of a well written line. We can create a realistic antagonist and a heroic protagonist. But can we create goodwill and encouragement in the real people who matter the most—our children?

It’s often been said that when raising your children, the days go slowly but the years fly by. As a grandma, I can attest to that fact!

Perhaps you are single and have no children. Have you thought about becoming a mentor to a parentless child? A foster parent? A big brother or sister who volunteers to take on a positive role in a world where so many kids flounder and feel unloved? My younger son became a Big Brother years ago to a fatherless 8-year-old. The boy is now a grown young man who my son still interacts with. We’ve made his “Little Brother” part of our family get-togethers.  My son took on that parental role and has kept the relationship going, even though he now has two children of us own.

Never downplay the importance of the parent-child relationship, no matter how old you are and no matter the biological tie.

Carry on.

Elaine Marie Cooper has two historical fiction books that released in 2019: War’s Respite (Prequel novella) and Love’s Kindling. Love’s Kindling is available in both e-book and paperback. They are the first two books in the Dawn of America Series set in Revolutionary War Connecticut. Cooper is the award-winning author of Fields of the Fatherless and Bethany’s Calendar. Her 2016 release (Saratoga Letters) was finalist in Historical Romance in both the Selah Awards and Next Generation Indie Book Awards. She has been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul and HomeLife magazine. She also penned the three-book historical series, Deer Run Saga. Her upcoming release, Scarred Vessels,” is about the black soldiers in the American Revolution. Look for it in October 2020. You can visit her website/ blog at www.elainemariecooper.com