The Picky Pen

Five Ways to Edit Dialogue

November 22, 2018

When thinking about the dialogue in our story, whether fiction or nonfiction, we must consider perspective. With each story, there should be one main character whose point of view by which the reader experiences the story. Dialogue is one of the storytelling tools that lets you reveal character, advance the plot, establish the setting, and deliver the theme, all at the same time. That means that your dialogue needs to be tight and very easy to read. Well written dialogue ensures that your characters’ conversations will move right along and enhance each of your characters, as well as the overall story message.

I’d like to share several ways you can self-edit your dialogue to make sure it is truly impactful for your readers.

How to edit dialogue

1.  The first way to self-edit your dialogue is to chop down wooden dialogue.

In real life, people stammer and repeat themselves when conversing, but the characters in your manuscript are supposed to sound natural and spontaneous. Wooden dialogue puts a wall between your characters and your readers and actually tells your readers what the characters are doing. Here is an example.

“Joy, why are you raising that hammer above your head?”

“Because I want to hang up this picture.”

This type of dialogue does two things. It tells the reader what the character is doing, and it is stilted conversation that gives narrative details. Because you want your readers to engage in your characters’ lives, you must chop down wooden dialogue so it is smooth instead of stiff or rehearsed. Let’s revise that bit of dialogue to bring out the characters’ personalities.

“Hey, that looks like a hard position to be in, let me help you.”

“Oh, thanks. I thought I was going to fall over.”

Doesn’t that sound a little more interesting? Good dialogue will engage your readers and show your characters’ personalities.

2. The second way to self-edit your dialogue is to get rid of insignificant dialogue.

In real life, people often exchange niceties, such as inquiring how someone is, or discussing the weather. Small talk is a way to cover up nervousness or before discussing more important or sensitive topics. But in our manuscripts, insignificant dialogue kills the dramatic purpose our characters have for each scene. If the purpose of your scene is to show the nervousness of two couples meeting for the first time, then perhaps insignificant dialogue might work, but don’t let it go on and on. The more significant you make your dialogue the more of an impact it will have on your readers. And for the most part, your dialogue needs to reveal the character’s goal and reason for having that particular conversation.

3 . The third way to self-edit your dialogue is to cut out repetitive dialogue.

Have you ever heard two people tell you the same story at the same time? This is what repetitive dialogue tends to do in your manuscript. Then the story gets very monotonous. It’s a good idea to read your dialogue sections out loud and look for repeated words and ideas that stand out to you. Let me give you an example of repetitive dialogue.

“He was elected unanimously. Everybody voted for him.”

This is the same thing twice, doesn’t it? To make this dialogue simpler, choose the strongest piece of dialogue that best conveys the scene’s purpose and the character’s goal in light of the overall message of the manuscript.

4 . The fourth way to self-edit your dialogue is to clothe the naked dialogue.

Readers want dialogue that discusses opinion, involves conflict, and keeps them turning the page. And often, dialogue is unimpressive. To enhance the dialogue so that it is impressive, we can do several things to our dialogue to enhance the reading experience and provide subtext.

Use descriptive tags. A tag helps the reader keep track of who is talking and reveals the characters manner of speaking when the words alone don’t imply it. For instance, “I’m not hungry,” Jerry moaned. what does this tell you about Jerry? Perhaps he is tired or sad. There are so many elements of subtext that we can read into just by the descriptive tag moaned.

Use speaker actions when they contradict or reinforce the spoken words, or when they help the reader picture the scene more easily. For instance, “I’m not hungry,” Jerry moaned, laying his head down on the table. Now how does Jerry feel? We know that by this action, he is tired, therefore, he is not hungry.

5.  The fifth way to self-edit your dialogue is by trimming overdressed dialogue.

Have you ever met someone who is cold-blooded, especially during the summer time and every time you see them they’re always wearing long sleeves? I don’t know about you but sometimes that makes me feel even hotter because that person is overdressed. This can also happen to our dialogue, where we use too much information in our dialogue. There are several ways that dialogue tends to be overdressed.

The use of speaker tags. Speaker tags describe the characters voice, but since it tends to chop up the dialogue, speaker tags should be used as little as possible. The only time it makes sense to use a speaker tag is when the reader might be confused which character is talking. Here is a poor example of overdressed dialogue:

“I’m going to the par-ty,” Isabella said happily, twirling.

“If you don’t stop twirling, you’re going to break something,” Robert said in a warning tone as he folded his arms.

Many times the speaker tags can repeat the tone within the dialogue therefore creating the problem of repetitive dialogue. And as we have already discussed, we can lace our dialogue best with meaningful actions, thoughts, and impressions. There are several ways that we can trim our dialogue.

The use of adverbs. Adverbs slow the reading down and does not engage your reader in the scene or conversation. Here is an example.

“I don’t want to get up at five!” she yelled angrily.

This dialogue reads boring, even though the content is interesting. If we removed the adverb, replacing with character action, we might have a different impression.

She dropped her book bag. “I don’t want to get up at five,” she yelled.

By replacing the adverbs with character action, your readers will get a sense of what the characters want, understand their personality, and be further engaged in the scene because the character actions match the dialogue.

Dialogue is a useful tool and a very important piece of effective storytelling. The time you invest in good self-editing, making sure that your dialogue is effective and important to your character’s motives and goals for the story, your readers will enjoy the richness of each scene that you create.

Please take a minute and join in the discussion! I’d love to hear from you!

What’s your favorite part about writing dialogue?

Tisha Martin writes historical fiction and nonfiction but also edits and proofreads for beginning and best-selling writers, professional editing agencies, and publishing houses. She has a BA in Professional Writing, an MS in English Education, and an editing certificate from the PEN Institute, affordable continuing education for editors. Active in American Christian Fiction Writers and The PEN, she appreciates the writing and editing communities. As Assistant Director of PENCON, a conference for editors, she enjoys travel marketing and updating PENCON’s Facebook Page. Connect with Tisha on her website www.tishamartin.com and engage in the conversation.

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